I used to date a Facebook addict. He would spend his days and nights hunched over his smartphone, liking posts, making comments, and “poking” other women. He was in this late 30s, not his teenage years, and his life consisted of work, Facebook, and occasionally he would look up and see I was in the room.
A few years of being invisible to a Facebook addict really had its toll. First, I was angry about the entire situation. Then, I started to remove Facebook from my life. I thought it would be hard, but after I got over the need to read about what other people were doing, the thrill of the whole thing was gone.
1. Waste of Time
Have you ever kept track of the time you spend on Facebook? Is it only a few minutes or do you lose hours reading feed and posting comments?
As a full-time writer, I set up a Facebook Page to run links to my latest blog posts. It takes me about an hour a month to schedule links to my posts. I schedule up to 4 posts per day and then vanish from Facebook for another month.
Before I started scheduling posts, I would log on to put up a post and wind up getting distracted by all the posts in my feed. Of course, I would have to like, comment, and make a post or two to my personal account. After awhile, I would lose an hour or two doing absolutely nothing productive. That means I was losing 7 to 14 hours a week to Facebook instead of spending that time working on my writing.
2. Raises Stress Levels
Have you ever logged on to your Facebook account and right away your eyes were assaulted by an offensive post? It happened to me all the time. The worse part was that some of the posts were being made by co-workers and the last thing I wanted to do was start a war of words with them. I reacted un-friending a lot of people.
I do not needed added stress in my life and neither do you. Reading the local news is enough to make my head explode. I don’t need to read everyone’s personal thoughts and “stupid” thoughts to raise my blood pressure to new heights. Instead, I would rather pick up an interesting book and read my way to bliss.
3. The Temptation to Share Personal Stuff
Some things should never be said in public. Unfortunately, Facebook gives people the feeling of security, as though they can say anything they want, from the comfort of their home, and none of the “wrong” people will ever see it. The truth is nothing online is personal, secure, or private.
If you have something you need to get off your chest and out of your head, do what your parents and grandparents used to do: keep a journal. Journalling allows you to write about things that bother you and you get to de-stress while you are doing it. As long as you keep your journal well-hidden in your home, the world is not going to see it.
4. Head Games
Too many head games are played on Facebook. I’ve been the victim of head games perpetrated by the women my then boyfriend was flirting with. It’s juvenile and reminiscent of high school. Now that I am in my early 40s, I want nothing to do with these type of people.
There are also the passive aggressive types, making nasty posts about a particular “someone”, but never coming out and stating the name of the person they are upset with.
Finally, there are those who will disagree with nearly every post they read and commence the name calling. Who needs that?
No, there are far too many head games being played on Facebook, making the whole experience a misery if you get caught in the middle or the end of the firing line.
5. Real Life Friends are Better
Unless you hang out with them and have shared actual life experiences with them, Facebook people are not your actual friends. Yes, there are some wonderful, caring people on Facebook, but until they have walked that mile by your side, they are actually just acquaintances.
Friends are real people that you can reach out and touch. They talk to you on the telephone and they stop over when they haven’t heard from you in awhile. Real friends stand by your side when your whole life seems to have gone to poop. They hold your hand and walk you through the worst moments and the happiest moments.
Facebook takes away the experience of finding and having a real friend. It makes us think that someone who likes a post or two of yours is a true friend. Not so.